I have always been fascinated by circles since I have been a kid. I don’t know why. Maybe it’s the idea of being able to start at one point and to end up at the same point after having traveled. I remember taking my bike as a kid and riding it in circles around our house over and over until I was certain that the Earth couldn’t turn without me. But now that I was facing the barrel of that M58 shotgun, I suddenly realized that no one was going to miss me. I mean I had friends and family whom I kept distances with as much as it’s socially acceptable to call them friends and family without disturbing the meaning behind those words and now I wonder if this entourage will come to miss me. I begged the shotgun but not the shooter to miss me because I was finally starting to figure what this Life was all about and a shotgun this powerful should be employed to more sensible ends as the killing of terrorists and dictators.
My pleading led to nowhere because the shooter pulled the trigger, I closed my eyes and waited for my brain to paint the wall but I only heard the click. Nothing happened. “I will be back one day” said the shooter “So better start every day like it’s your last one because it might as well be.”
We used to be friends before you know? Then out of nowhere, the next day, I saw her walking down the street like this, I knew it was her because I would recognize that hesitant step anywhere. You could see two small holes she had made so she would still be able to see as she made her way to God knows where. She didn’t even react when I called her. Maybe she was right to treat me like a stranger. After all, I didn’t see this coming. Aren’t friends supposed to know when their friend is about to do something as drastic as refusing to be seen anymore? Refusing to be labeled, to be colored, to be called, to be recognized, and simply asking to be accepted simply without any “BUT…” hanging around. I couldn’t take it though to see her like that, so I started walking on the other side of street since she still took the same path to work which was the same for me and I couldn’t take it to be meeting this stranger who used to be my friend.